blackfrancine (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
blackfrancine) wrote2011-01-04 01:12 am
blackfrancine) wrote2011-01-04 01:12 am
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Shipwreck! Or how I learned to stop worrying and apply my Spuffy philosophies to Veronica Mars!
So, lately I maybe have been rewatching Veronica Mars for, like, the 4th time. And, as is now my way when my obsessiveness reaches a certain fever pitch, I’ve gone looking for good VMars fic. And I have to say a few things.
First, I’ve been so spoiled by this little corner of fandom. Really and truly. Spoiled rotten. We’re so organized. There are so many archives! And awards! And people with kick ass indexed journals! And to some extent I guess all that’s to be expected. VMars ran for a much shorter time, had a much smaller following, and it’s not fantasy/sci-fi, so I think that it probably attracts fewer hardcore fans. And the result is that there’s much, much less to choose from fanfic-wise than in Buffy fandom. So, of course there’s less good-quality writing out there. And… I get that. I do. But, what I find a little troubling is the proportion of fics that make Logan into a big ol’ woobie while painting Veronica as a soul-sucking bitch. Because I just cannot read such juvenilely developed characters as that. I can’t do it.
Um. Spoilers through the end of the series under the cut.
Don’t get me wrong—I love me some Logan. But I love him because he’s NOT perfect (yes, I realize this should probably be tattooed somewhere on my person: I’ll get a big red heart with a banner across it that says “Flawed Characters”). He’s a total fucking dick to Veronica for ¾ of the show. Yes—it’s because he’s hurt and lashing out. But that doesn’t really change how he’s behaving, now, does it? If we can hold Veronica responsible for her behavior (as we should) and call her a bitch (as we should not)—we can admit that Logan isn’t perfect.
And man, does Veronica ever fuck some stuff up. She gets things wrong, wrong, wrong. But I love that. I love it because it’s so honest. Because, trust me: Someone as emotionally screwed up as Veronica and with such an acerbic wit as hers is going to say some mean shit sometimes—stuff she shouldn’t say, stuff she’s ashamed that she said. It’s gonna hurt the people she cares about, and she’s not going to know what to do to make it up to them. And so she’ll gloss over it. I understand why people don’t necessarily like that about her. But FFS. You gotta take the good with the bad, people. You don’t get a sassy, clever, tough-as-nails heroine who’s got all of her emotional ducks in a row. It just doesn’t work that way, people. So get over it.
Of course, Buffy fandom has more than its fair share of that nonsense too. But I literally can’t find any VMars fic that doesn’t to some extent woobify Logan while tearing down Veronica (well, maybe one story—we’ll see. It’s a WIP, so Veronica could still end up as a heartless shrew). Like, there’s NO ONE in the entire fandom who sympathizes primarily with Veronica. WTF.
Anyway, the fic situation in that fandom is so dire, dear f-list, that I—yes, I—have been considering attempting to write something. The only thing that keeps me from actually doing it is that I have no good ideas and my writing would probably suck. But by George, I would not give an unbalanced view of the characters. Of that you can rest assured.
So, as I was sitting around, trying to sort out my feelings about Piz and Veronica and Logan and the series ending and how I would continue it in a fic, the entire universe and all its meaning was revealed to me through the ships that I ship. So, I’m here to share with you what I learned in that moment of nirvana.
I’ve struggled for a while with Veronica and Piz—because—dammit, I really like Piz. Like, a lot. He’s funny, he’s hot, he’s adorable, he respects Veronica, he loves Wallace, he’s got goals and smarts and good taste in music and excellent forearms. He’s just good. Good in every way. And Veronica knows it. In fact, I think she feels the exact same way I do. How could she not? I mean, she was clearly attracted to him from the get go in season 3—she hesitates when he asks if Logan is her boyfriend, she repeats his joke about Nixon finding bowling soothing, she doesn’t want to do Parker’s “find out if Piz likes me” reconnaissance. Because, hey, she kinda digs him. And that’s totally okay, people. It doesn’t mean she’s a filthy whore for looking at a man other than Logan. It’s completely normal for people in (good, healthy, loving) relationships to let their gaze linger on some hot young thing a little too long. It’s no big deal. (But it is, in fact, a little bit of a problem in this case because Veronica and Logan have some serious blindspots in their relationship that they need to fix before they go introducing temptation).
And when Piz and Veronica are together in those final episodes of the series, she’s steady, centered. And maybe that’s what most shook me up about their relationship—and Logan’s relationships with both Parker and Hannah—the lack of… what's the word? Drama? Hannah/Logan had lots o’ drama, though. But still, internally, the relationship was steady—not bumpy. Veronica and Logan was always bumpy. And… maybe Piz brought out a good balance to Veronica—there’s a scene in the series finale, “The Bitch Is Back,” where a jackass at school is taunting Veronica about her sex tape. She wants to tase him—or at least to threaten him, but Piz convinces her to turn the other cheek and just leave without confronting him. It’s an interesting scene because of how finely its contrasted with Logan’s approach to the same situation (how he beats down Piz and Gorey, the maker of the sex tape). Maybe Veronica needs some of that pacifism. Maybe she needs to dial down the wrath. So, why do I still cheer for she and Logan to reunite?
Am I cheering for my girl to end up with the wrong dude? Would Piz make her feel happy and safe, while Logan would just shred her heart (while she simultaneously shreds his)?
The answer is no. I’m not cheering for the wrong pair. I’m sure of it. How am I so sure, you ask? Because of Buffy and Spike.
Ultimately, the question comes down to a choice between comfortable trust and life-and-death trust. It comes down to choosing between not having to explain yourself because the other person literally has no idea what you’re thinking about—so it doesn’t matter—it’ll never occur to them to ask the tough questions or not having to explain yourself because you’ve been through so much with the other person that they know--like some sort of reptilian instinct--what you need. It comes down—and this is important—to the choice of being with someone who doesn’t scare you—he doesn’t scare you because he can’t reach that tender, dark, scary part of you. He doesn’t even know it’s there. He doesn’t seem to have a tender, dark, scary part—so it will never occur to him to go looking for yours, so you're safe. The REAL you is safe. OR you can choose to be with someone who scares the shit out of you because they know all the ways to hurt you. They know all your secrets. Moreover, they just understand how you’re built. They know how undo your armor. And after experiencing betrayal after betrayal, the idea of someone being able to get below your armor is the most terrifying thing in the entire world.
Buffy and Spike go through this same type of thing. Buffy can choose to cling to her safe delusions about Angel—or she can choose to be with Spike—the guy who challenges her, hurts her, scares her, understands her, makes her feel a genuine connection with another person, makes her want to continue to try, to continue to carry on.
Veronica is exhausted from the emotional toll that being in such a challenging relationship takes—so I don’t blame her for trying out things with Piz. Like I said: He’s great. I love him. But he’ll never be able to push her, to know her like Logan can. And ultimately, she needs that. She needs the understanding--because she's never going to be able to express herself, her intimate feelings really easily.
The problem is that she’s terrified of how deeply Logan makes her feel—because the more deeply she feels for him, the more pain he’s bound to cause her. So, she decides that what she needs is the steadiness over the spark. And that’s fair. Lots of people choose that. But ideally, she and Logan would find a balance similar to the one that Spike and Buffy find in season 7. The heat, the fire between them that almost consumed them both in season 6 turns into an effulgent glow—a love that holds them like gravity to the earth—provides them with both order and warmth. Like white-hot coals—it’s a fire that burns furiously hot but not out of control.
I think it’s interesting—because in the real world, those fiery relationships are really hard to maintain. They’re hard to harness into something slower burning, less destructive. And probably most of the time, they consume everyone who gets within 10 miles of the relationship epicenter. But, damn. I have to say that I think the conversion of wildfire into a controlled burn is the best possible romantic scenario (for me at least). Hard to achieve, sure. But… ideal.
Veronica was on the right track to finding that type of balance. God. She was so close to getting it right—and then she chickened out. In season 3, in “Tramps and Thieves,” Veronica wants Logan to just come clean about all his indiscretions and she promised to just accept them and move on. It was the right thing. But she screwed it up. Maybe the glimpse of real pain that Logan’s indiscretion caused terrified her away from the intimacy—maybe she felt the need to slam shut all those doors she’d started to open. But, I have to think that eventually, those two would’ve gotten it right. That they’d find a way to their own effulgence.
So, yeah. I guess my point is that, remember that BuffySecrets Tumblr poster from a while back that said that she’d use Buffy/Spike as an example of a bad relationship? I guess I’m pretty much the opposite of that. These are my rambling thoughts.
Also if anyone has any fic recs, I'd appreciate them muchly.
First, I’ve been so spoiled by this little corner of fandom. Really and truly. Spoiled rotten. We’re so organized. There are so many archives! And awards! And people with kick ass indexed journals! And to some extent I guess all that’s to be expected. VMars ran for a much shorter time, had a much smaller following, and it’s not fantasy/sci-fi, so I think that it probably attracts fewer hardcore fans. And the result is that there’s much, much less to choose from fanfic-wise than in Buffy fandom. So, of course there’s less good-quality writing out there. And… I get that. I do. But, what I find a little troubling is the proportion of fics that make Logan into a big ol’ woobie while painting Veronica as a soul-sucking bitch. Because I just cannot read such juvenilely developed characters as that. I can’t do it.
Um. Spoilers through the end of the series under the cut.
Don’t get me wrong—I love me some Logan. But I love him because he’s NOT perfect (yes, I realize this should probably be tattooed somewhere on my person: I’ll get a big red heart with a banner across it that says “Flawed Characters”). He’s a total fucking dick to Veronica for ¾ of the show. Yes—it’s because he’s hurt and lashing out. But that doesn’t really change how he’s behaving, now, does it? If we can hold Veronica responsible for her behavior (as we should) and call her a bitch (as we should not)—we can admit that Logan isn’t perfect.
And man, does Veronica ever fuck some stuff up. She gets things wrong, wrong, wrong. But I love that. I love it because it’s so honest. Because, trust me: Someone as emotionally screwed up as Veronica and with such an acerbic wit as hers is going to say some mean shit sometimes—stuff she shouldn’t say, stuff she’s ashamed that she said. It’s gonna hurt the people she cares about, and she’s not going to know what to do to make it up to them. And so she’ll gloss over it. I understand why people don’t necessarily like that about her. But FFS. You gotta take the good with the bad, people. You don’t get a sassy, clever, tough-as-nails heroine who’s got all of her emotional ducks in a row. It just doesn’t work that way, people. So get over it.
Of course, Buffy fandom has more than its fair share of that nonsense too. But I literally can’t find any VMars fic that doesn’t to some extent woobify Logan while tearing down Veronica (well, maybe one story—we’ll see. It’s a WIP, so Veronica could still end up as a heartless shrew). Like, there’s NO ONE in the entire fandom who sympathizes primarily with Veronica. WTF.
Anyway, the fic situation in that fandom is so dire, dear f-list, that I—yes, I—have been considering attempting to write something. The only thing that keeps me from actually doing it is that I have no good ideas and my writing would probably suck. But by George, I would not give an unbalanced view of the characters. Of that you can rest assured.
So, as I was sitting around, trying to sort out my feelings about Piz and Veronica and Logan and the series ending and how I would continue it in a fic, the entire universe and all its meaning was revealed to me through the ships that I ship. So, I’m here to share with you what I learned in that moment of nirvana.
I’ve struggled for a while with Veronica and Piz—because—dammit, I really like Piz. Like, a lot. He’s funny, he’s hot, he’s adorable, he respects Veronica, he loves Wallace, he’s got goals and smarts and good taste in music and excellent forearms. He’s just good. Good in every way. And Veronica knows it. In fact, I think she feels the exact same way I do. How could she not? I mean, she was clearly attracted to him from the get go in season 3—she hesitates when he asks if Logan is her boyfriend, she repeats his joke about Nixon finding bowling soothing, she doesn’t want to do Parker’s “find out if Piz likes me” reconnaissance. Because, hey, she kinda digs him. And that’s totally okay, people. It doesn’t mean she’s a filthy whore for looking at a man other than Logan. It’s completely normal for people in (good, healthy, loving) relationships to let their gaze linger on some hot young thing a little too long. It’s no big deal. (But it is, in fact, a little bit of a problem in this case because Veronica and Logan have some serious blindspots in their relationship that they need to fix before they go introducing temptation).
And when Piz and Veronica are together in those final episodes of the series, she’s steady, centered. And maybe that’s what most shook me up about their relationship—and Logan’s relationships with both Parker and Hannah—the lack of… what's the word? Drama? Hannah/Logan had lots o’ drama, though. But still, internally, the relationship was steady—not bumpy. Veronica and Logan was always bumpy. And… maybe Piz brought out a good balance to Veronica—there’s a scene in the series finale, “The Bitch Is Back,” where a jackass at school is taunting Veronica about her sex tape. She wants to tase him—or at least to threaten him, but Piz convinces her to turn the other cheek and just leave without confronting him. It’s an interesting scene because of how finely its contrasted with Logan’s approach to the same situation (how he beats down Piz and Gorey, the maker of the sex tape). Maybe Veronica needs some of that pacifism. Maybe she needs to dial down the wrath. So, why do I still cheer for she and Logan to reunite?
Am I cheering for my girl to end up with the wrong dude? Would Piz make her feel happy and safe, while Logan would just shred her heart (while she simultaneously shreds his)?
The answer is no. I’m not cheering for the wrong pair. I’m sure of it. How am I so sure, you ask? Because of Buffy and Spike.
Ultimately, the question comes down to a choice between comfortable trust and life-and-death trust. It comes down to choosing between not having to explain yourself because the other person literally has no idea what you’re thinking about—so it doesn’t matter—it’ll never occur to them to ask the tough questions or not having to explain yourself because you’ve been through so much with the other person that they know--like some sort of reptilian instinct--what you need. It comes down—and this is important—to the choice of being with someone who doesn’t scare you—he doesn’t scare you because he can’t reach that tender, dark, scary part of you. He doesn’t even know it’s there. He doesn’t seem to have a tender, dark, scary part—so it will never occur to him to go looking for yours, so you're safe. The REAL you is safe. OR you can choose to be with someone who scares the shit out of you because they know all the ways to hurt you. They know all your secrets. Moreover, they just understand how you’re built. They know how undo your armor. And after experiencing betrayal after betrayal, the idea of someone being able to get below your armor is the most terrifying thing in the entire world.
Buffy and Spike go through this same type of thing. Buffy can choose to cling to her safe delusions about Angel—or she can choose to be with Spike—the guy who challenges her, hurts her, scares her, understands her, makes her feel a genuine connection with another person, makes her want to continue to try, to continue to carry on.
Veronica is exhausted from the emotional toll that being in such a challenging relationship takes—so I don’t blame her for trying out things with Piz. Like I said: He’s great. I love him. But he’ll never be able to push her, to know her like Logan can. And ultimately, she needs that. She needs the understanding--because she's never going to be able to express herself, her intimate feelings really easily.
The problem is that she’s terrified of how deeply Logan makes her feel—because the more deeply she feels for him, the more pain he’s bound to cause her. So, she decides that what she needs is the steadiness over the spark. And that’s fair. Lots of people choose that. But ideally, she and Logan would find a balance similar to the one that Spike and Buffy find in season 7. The heat, the fire between them that almost consumed them both in season 6 turns into an effulgent glow—a love that holds them like gravity to the earth—provides them with both order and warmth. Like white-hot coals—it’s a fire that burns furiously hot but not out of control.
I think it’s interesting—because in the real world, those fiery relationships are really hard to maintain. They’re hard to harness into something slower burning, less destructive. And probably most of the time, they consume everyone who gets within 10 miles of the relationship epicenter. But, damn. I have to say that I think the conversion of wildfire into a controlled burn is the best possible romantic scenario (for me at least). Hard to achieve, sure. But… ideal.
Veronica was on the right track to finding that type of balance. God. She was so close to getting it right—and then she chickened out. In season 3, in “Tramps and Thieves,” Veronica wants Logan to just come clean about all his indiscretions and she promised to just accept them and move on. It was the right thing. But she screwed it up. Maybe the glimpse of real pain that Logan’s indiscretion caused terrified her away from the intimacy—maybe she felt the need to slam shut all those doors she’d started to open. But, I have to think that eventually, those two would’ve gotten it right. That they’d find a way to their own effulgence.
So, yeah. I guess my point is that, remember that BuffySecrets Tumblr poster from a while back that said that she’d use Buffy/Spike as an example of a bad relationship? I guess I’m pretty much the opposite of that. These are my rambling thoughts.
Also if anyone has any fic recs, I'd appreciate them muchly.