blackfrancine: (BtVS: Spuffy has doorsex)
 Okay, about 3 minutes ago I was driving home from work, and I was struck out of nowhere with the thought that Buffy and Spike were seeking to destroy themselves with their love/attraction to each other.  

This is touched on in FFL--"You're a little bit in love with Death... and one of these days, I'm gonna slip in there."  And then, of course, he does.  He represents peace and death and completion for Buffy, and on a really bad day for her ("You came back wrong")--he slips in there, and gets her to admit that she does desire death. 
But that's all about Buffy's death wish. WHAT OF SPIKE'S DEATH WISH, HUH?  It's dismissed in Smashed that he, Slayer of Slayers, is in love with the girl who represents death for him--"Vampire, remember? I'm supposed to be treading on the dark side.  What's your excuse?" --and sort of played off as incompetence or softness on his part--"All you can do is follow me around making moon eyes."  But it's so much more than that.  He's in love with his own destruction AT LEAST as much as Buffy is with hers. As William, he willingly walked right into his death, then as William the Bloody, he asked Angelus if he didn't ever want to fight a fight he didn't know he could win. He WANTED the uncertainty--he wanted the chance--just the chance--to die. And as Spike, of course--of course--he loves the one girl in all the world who can destroy him.  And he feeds off it.  He knows he's crawling after her, seeking his own bit of oblivion, his own demolition. She's the sun and he just wants to bask in her--flames and vampire dust be damned. The danger, the certainty that she'll destroy him (either that or he'll destroy her) is always there--and it only eggs him on.  He wants his death so bad that he can taste it.  And, the poet in him wants his death to come from love.  From loving.  

Funny that, in SR, when he realizes that he did in fact hurt Buffy, as he was sure he'd never really do--funny that he goes and seeks his soul.  He finds a way to not hurt her.  He finds a way to make sure that it's his death, his destruction--not hers--that will come from it all.  He destroys himself because he wants to, and also because he doesn't want to destroy her. <3

Anyway.  Beautiful symmetry those two have.  

Second thing.  I got Final Cut Express today!  I'm so excited and terrified.  And I'm having a bizarre flood of vid-inspiration (vidspiration?) all circling around They Might Be Giants songs.  Weird, huh?  Anyway.  If anyone knows of some good tutorial sites especially for Final Cut, I would be eternally grateful.   
blackfrancine: (BtVS: Buffy's hat has a cow)
Good gravy, it's been quiet around here lately.  I'm at work right now, and I'm so bored that I'm trying to think of something--anything--to post about. 

So, I guess I'll just yak about my rewatching thoughts, even though they're not really cohesive at all.  But, seriously, how often are any of my thoughts cohesive?  So, I suppose that shouldn't stop me. 

AtS thoughts )
Buffy, AYW thoughts )
blackfrancine: (BtVS: Spuffy Kiss-Something Blue)
BUFFY: Your job is to kill the slayer. But all you can do is follow me around making moon eyes.
SPIKE: I'm in love with you.
BUFFY: (still advancing) You're in love with pain. Admit it. (Spike gets up) You like me ... because you enjoy getting beat down.

This isn't too long--but cut anyway. )
blackfrancine: (BtVS: Buffy's Creepy)
Jeesh, y'all.  Thirty days is really a whole lotta days.  This meme just goes on and on.  It's like Celine Dion's heart.  

And before I start, can I just say how simultaneously excited and disappointed I was with the Veronica Mars's performance in FMM.  I totally didn't think she'd get that far.  She took out Kurt Hummel, y'all.  He's a juggernaut.  But nothing my girl couldn't handle.  And then... only to lose such a hard-fought race.  So sad.  Vote Troy.  Because life has no meaning for me now that Veronica and Buffy are out.  Troy is my last shining light of hope.  

Okay.  Three more days.
Day 26: Something in canon that I'd change )Day 27: Something that I'd add to canon )Day 28: Hottest scene )
blackfrancine: (BtVS: Timothy Dalton vs. Sean Connery)

Okay, you guys.  Here we go!  Recommendation day is here at last!  My main way of participating in fandom has been to consume the amazing work created by others more talented than myself.  So, I'm really excited to have an excuse to talk about some of my  favorite works and maybe introduce some of y'all to one or two new fics or vids.

But there's a lot here.  Especially in the vid section, as you can see.  So, you might want to stretch and get some water--I don't want anyone pulling a muscle or getting dehydrated trying to marathon all the awesome that's about to come flying at your head.  

FYI--This post is going be my html masterpiece if even half of the embeds and links work.  It took me all day.

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens )
blackfrancine: (BtVS: Buffy and Spike are partners)

 Okay.  So.  Sometimes I get to a really mature, intellectual place about Spike & Buffy--and even when I'm in that place, I'm full of flailing and squishy feelings.  But I get all excited over the ~literary-ness of it all.  The symbolism, the motifs, the mirrors, the coherence of the characterization.  

Right now, I'm not in that place. I'm in a place where all my feelings are gone and they have been replaced with SPUFFY. And not in a good way. Like in a painful, terrified way.  I was just watching some vids.  And all I can say is that I know now why I didn't read the comics for so long--why I kept thinking about reading them and then putting it off:  Because I think I will literally die if something really bad happens to this ship.  I just watched Winter Song by [ profile] darlapr0duction , which I had downloaded! and feel really lucky, since it's now been removed from public space.  And then I watched my new favorite (the vid isn't new, it's just new to being my favorite) by [ profile] nvrbnkisst , Diappearing World.

My gosh. I just love the sense of partnership and equality in that vid.

And then there's Halo by Darla Productions:

(This is really 3 vids all squished together. The first one is Halo.)

But. I think I'm going to shatter, you guys. I've also been watching other "Spuffy" vids--but they're a little more grim than these. They obviously think the relationship wasn't going to work. And I think they blame Buffy. They don't think she loved him. And for some reason, it's killing me.

Normally, I think I can be a mature consumer of media and accept what's given to me. Normally, I really like Chosen. But right now I want to break a lamp. Because I just want a fucking happy ending. I NEED a happy ending. I feel like something inside of me is going to split open if they don't get a happy ending. And--yes--I know. I know. Chosen IS a happy ending. Like I said, I normally feel that way. But right now, I just need Chosen without the death and with an exuberant makeout session.

I have no idea what my deal is tonight.
blackfrancine: (BtVS: Spike--Randy's a superhero)
So, no!  I didn't give up on the 30 Days of Buffy meme!  I finally got my software all sorted out and my computer firing on all cylinders. And I've spent the last 3 days working on the picspam that is hiding below the cut. Oooh. Suspenseful.  

Now, my Photoshopping skills are what you might generously call rudimentary. But this, you guys, is my Mona Lisa. My Sistine Chapel. My... Still Life with Woodpecker?

Anyway. It came out almost how I wanted it to. So, I'm pleased.  So without further ado, I give you Day 13: My favorite character arc.  

Day 13: Favorite Character Arc )
blackfrancine: (Default)
Day 6 is my favorite couple, and I’m not even going to play the fake-you-out game where I pretend like my favorite pairing is Xander/Cordelia or Willow/Kennedy, because we all know what I’m going to pick.

So brace yourself, f-list and assorted other readers. Because you’re about to be punched in the face with the full force of my shipping fury.

AHOY! The ship is settin' sail, mateys! )
blackfrancine: (Default)
This was another difficult choice. I kept thinking of an episode that I love—and then I’d start to write up an explanation of why it’s the GREATEST EPISODE EVAR, and then suddenly I’d remember another episode. And I was like, D’oh. I think I like that episode more than the other one.

Yeah… repeat these steps about four times, and you have an idea of the evolution of this post.

So, I made a little list of the runners up, because I think they deserve some recognition as well.

You were fighting as a soldier on their side )
blackfrancine: (Smarter than you VMars)
So, lately I maybe have been rewatching Veronica Mars for, like, the 4th time. And, as is now my way when my obsessiveness reaches a certain fever pitch, I’ve gone looking for good VMars fic. And I have to say a few things.

First, I’ve been so spoiled by this little corner of fandom. Really and truly. Spoiled rotten. We’re so organized. There are so many archives! And awards! And people with kick ass indexed journals! And to some extent I guess all that’s to be expected. VMars ran for a much shorter time, had a much smaller following, and it’s not fantasy/sci-fi, so I think that it probably attracts fewer hardcore fans. And the result is that there’s much, much less to choose from fanfic-wise than in Buffy fandom. So, of course there’s less good-quality writing out there. And… I get that. I do. But, what I find a little troubling is the proportion of fics that make Logan into a big ol’ woobie while painting Veronica as a soul-sucking bitch. Because I just cannot read such juvenilely developed characters as that. I can’t do it.

Um.  Spoilers through the end of the series under the cut. 

Cut because I just can't shut up )
blackfrancine: (Default)
So, I've been a little bored lately. And this has forced me to entertain myself--so (inspired by something negative I saw on Tumblr), I started thinking about how much I love Buffy, the character. Then, out of further boredom, I decided to make an art project or two. It truly is shocking the things that boredom will drive me to.

Please to be reading my love letter to my fictional BFF, Buffy.

Let me count the ways... )

ETA: I don't know why my picspams are showing up so small.  I swear the original files aren't that size.  Oh well.  
blackfrancine: (Default)
Woot! The boyfriend is out of town for the weekend, so guess what that means… It means I get to be totally hedonistic—and do whatever I want and no one will distract me with their questions, like “Hey, are you hungry, should we go get lunch?” or “Have you seen this awesome clip of a corgi jumping into a lake in slow mo?” Just me and AtS and other fannish Internetting things for a whole 2 days. Well, that and I’m gonna have to paint the base boards in the living room—-BUT! I can put Angel on while I paint. I am a deluxe multi-tasker!

But first, before I throw myself headlong into my weekend of hedonism and isolation, I have to share with you the Spuffy revelation that was just… uh… revealed to me. I was reading some older entries in [ profile] molly_may ’s journal today while I was at work (and should have been working--not so much a multi-tasker at the office). And a few months ago she posted this most excellent poll with bonus picspams!

Click for Visual Aids and Epiphanies  )


blackfrancine: (Default)

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